A Terrible Beauty: What Teachers Know but Seldom Tell outside the Staff Room by Dave St.John

Author:Dave St.John
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: public schools, romance, teaching
Publisher: Dave St.John

“I’ll phone Helvey have her pick you up on her way out. That okay?”

She did her best to smile. “That will be fine.”

And he was gone. She watched from the window as he pulled away. It was snowing again. After her shower, she dropped into the deep leather chair to read, but her book held no interest for her tonight. For a long time she stared at the pendulum on her clock, ignoring the book held before her. She felt his arms sheltering her in the hall where she’d fallen and imagined herself reading what she’d written at Thursday’s dismissal hearing. The thought made her squirm in the chair’s embrace.

The floor heater clicked on, ignited, sputtered, ticked.

The apartment had always been quiet. As long as she’d lived here she’d liked it, needed it that way.

But not tonight. Tonight it was too quiet.

• • •

Aurora picked her up at six a.m., Honda wagon smelling of roast turkey and oatmeal cookies. Mouth watering, Solange wished she hadn’t skipped breakfast. They rode in silence until they were out of the city, the only sound wipers and heavy rain against the windshield.

She could tell Aurora had something to say. Whatever it was, she wished she would say it.

“Lordy, if this rain keeps up we’ll need an ark! River Road’s already under a foot of water.”

Solange waited—there was something else.

“This is Dai’s last week, isn’t it?” Aurora said.

That was it. “It might be.”

Aurora drove as if considering whether or not to say more. At last she sighed, turning to look at Solange. “He’s a very special person. I can’t imagine Elk River without him. There are only a few of us left who don’t take it all so seriously. So many of the new teachers, like those clucks at the other end of the table, think every new philosophy that comes down the pike is going to save the world. They get so excited about everything, you’d think they thought of it.”

Solange wondered where this was heading.

“After the accident I think he just decided not to lie any more.”

The wipers worked as they drove past sodden forest and pasture.

“I’m with him, but let’s face it, where would we all be if we stopped playing along? We’re not ready for that much honesty, are we? It scares us, that much truth all at once. The lies are so comfortable, so soft and cozy.”

Solange frowned. “What is the truth, then?”

Aurora, gripping the wheel tightly, leaned forward to peer out the fogged window, then laughed her goofy laugh. “That it’s all flimflam.”

She didn’t understand. “Flimflam?”

“All that about meeting every child’s needs. The truth is that some kids can be educated, and others can’t, period. That it’s nine parts what the kid will do—can do—to one part teacher and school. That’s it, that’s the ugly truth we don’t want anybody to know.” Aurora raised a hand, palm up between them. “Well? Isn’t It? That’s why we spend all our time running around muddying the waters with new programs, new acronyms, new code words.

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